Dread

This entry is in response to Arvin’s latest post, kind of.

IMAGINE THIS:

You're in your room, alone. With you is a 6-inch knife. You hold it and point it to yourself, your gut. Then you tell yourself, "What if I stab myself? What would happen? So what? Is there something to stop me from doing so?"

Nothing is holding you back. It's risk. It's freedom. It’s dreadful.

***

There are times that we feel paradoxically upset and scared when we are faced with something and that we have to act upon it. Especially if we have absolutely NO ONE to blame for it, no one accountable for that action, that if we mess up we’ll be the one in deep shit. Paradoxically because, most of us consciously think that we don’t need and we don’t want other people controlling our lives. What most people don’t realize is that its anguish when there’s no one accountable for our own actions, if we would be the only one blamable.

It’s terrible if nothing’s predetermined, horrible if there’s nothing to stop us from committing something, awful if on our every action, we’re all ALONE.

That is why many people would rather follow blindly the dictates of society, not realizing, or even thinking, that there are times that reality is irrelevant. Few people would find time to think what they really want, career, education, relationship etc, because they’re too scared to face the consequences. If one would only look on the “Consumer-cialization” of education, the point would be more obvious than the sun on a summer noon. Rather than exercise their free will, a lot of people foolishly let themselves be swept away by the trends of society.

Freedom obviously entails risk, and calls for the individual to be responsible for his/her actions. If you want to be able to go out freely on a Saturday night, you have to be responsible of what would happen. Parental permissions, assignments, knife fights, snipers, rape. If you want democracy, engage in healthy socio-political discourses. If you want something to change, go ahead and participate in changing it. A lot of people are clamoring for change and progress, but they’re not willing to get their lazy asses off their couches to contribute, too static not to leave their comfort zones, too scared to stand up for what they really believe in, for what is RIGHT.

Which brings me to another horrible truth: a lot of people don’t really think nowadays.