I have been reviewing some key philosophical ideas for the past months, thanks to the following persons for being my inspiration:
- Dominic Gonzales and Adrian Alcala, ex-seminarian friends
- Mr. Jay Aureada, ex-seminarian and co-faculty of mine
- Tracy Llanera, the summa cum laude of our batch
They're all philosophy majors.
I taught that subject, Philosophy of Man, last semester, and have been astonished because of a fairly obvious thing: that the key for understanding Sociological theories is to have a firm grounding on the basic concepts of philosophy, be it classical or modern (I am not acquainted with post-modern thought just yet). This is a thing that I wasn't aware of long ago, because I'm a moron. My last semester's Socio-Anthro class was rather boring, since they were only 11 students, and were rather passive ones, and so I preoccupied myself with my 2 philosophy classes. And so I spent hours on the library couch reading this and that book, exclaiming "aha!" much to the surprise of the librarian many times, getting scolded because I was not in the faculty room during my consultation hours because I was studying somewhere else.
When my philosophical interest was reawakened, it set-off a series of I-am-such-a-fool-to-think-that-such-and-such chain of events so horrible to even mentio--
I was reacquainted with the 3 Giants of Greek Philosophy, which strengthened my grip on Comte, Sorokim, Durkheim, Weber and Marx. Concepts that were unknown and unclear to me years ago were now crystal. Leafing through pages of Kierkegaard, Sartre, Husserl, Nietzsche and Heidegger enabled me to understand and interpret more the theories of Phenomenology, Ethnomethodology, Structural Functionalism, and Communicative Action. A clearer glance at postmodernism, too. What surprised me is the strengthening of my faith when I read Aquinas and Augustine. Not to mention conversations about the basis of the Roman Catholic Faith while drinking every Thursday after the novena mass. I remember joining the TWG years ago to get my hands on more academic and creative pastiche. It helped me a lot.
Then a painful regret dawned on me: that its too bad I never bothered to consolidate my philosophical knowledge to understand sociology more.
This exactly why I was vomiting in the PICC restrooms two years ago, I don't want to graduate yet because of my inadequacies in my academics.
I would've excelled more on my academics, got higher grades in PolDy and LRT, not to mention a better thesis. I regret not knowing Tracy earlier, and not talking to my batchmate Leonel, her classmate, about these stuff not (really?) knowing that it'll be helpful to all of us. I was a fool forgetting that my inadequacies in Sociological theories is a result of my loose grip on philosophy. No wonder why Emanovich Batonivsky, that ex-seminarian who once slapped my own incompetence to my face 3 years ago, is so damn good. I envy those people, their academic rigidity to stay focused in these things. They are the people who would change the very face of the world, the people who, two decades from now, would be taught to all schools.
Sociology people: learn from them and let them learn from us. Learn from our professors in the university as much as you can, and use the skills in other subjects to complement the major ones. Remember what Vision and Mission means, what theory and practice is, because without the sufficient amount of both our 4 years in college would be futile. Never fall into that trap of learning more and more about less and less.
Sociology majors have been looked down upon for the past years, LET US NOT GIVE THEM REASONS TO DO THAT AGAIN.
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Sunday, March 22, 2009
Envy
To whom? To TWG members / alumni.
I can't write, not even a single relevant or significant post in my blogs since January 25, much less something of literary value. This academic year's been a bitch for me. Although I got to work as a college instructor (modesty aside, in a ho-hum, so-so institution), it seems that since then, I have been in a sort of writer's block. Block, as in mental block in writing. Everytime that I get an idea of what to write, which also rarely happens since then, my pen would just end doodling on the paper. My eyes would just get watery staring at the screen in an attempt on changing the very face of the world with my text.
Worse, when I finally wrestled with myself into writing anything, usually in the form of a poem, or say a blog post like this, it'll just get butchered, not expressed even as a sigh, but a yelp. Instead of cooked sausages for breakfast, it'll be served looking like a mashed spam.
Pathetic, because everytime I see pictures of TWG alumni members in an activity like a workshop, forum, or just drinking beer, the more I refuse to succumb to the fact that the reason I cannot write is because I am not with them, although it seems that its obvious as the sun in midday. I cannot write because, it seems, as I am isolated from them, so am I isolated from literary practice. And to think that just after my graduation I have been hoping to improve my poetics, tch. So much so that when I imagine myself being with them in this or that event and the topic would be literature, I wouldn't be able to understand, much less keep up.
This year I don't remember writing anything with literary content, much less published on anything. Even managing to pass applications for workshops weren't done. I am not sure if this is to be blamed on my situation, or just my lack of organization and "talent," whatever that may be. I am thinking of being "invisible" from TWG people until I can write anything worthy of serious thought, but am not sure if this could be accomplished, or what would be accomplished by doing it.
As if being abused and degraded by my co-workers is not enough.
Fuck. I so hate this self doubt.
Was I really able to write?
I can't write, not even a single relevant or significant post in my blogs since January 25, much less something of literary value. This academic year's been a bitch for me. Although I got to work as a college instructor (modesty aside, in a ho-hum, so-so institution), it seems that since then, I have been in a sort of writer's block. Block, as in mental block in writing. Everytime that I get an idea of what to write, which also rarely happens since then, my pen would just end doodling on the paper. My eyes would just get watery staring at the screen in an attempt on changing the very face of the world with my text.
Worse, when I finally wrestled with myself into writing anything, usually in the form of a poem, or say a blog post like this, it'll just get butchered, not expressed even as a sigh, but a yelp. Instead of cooked sausages for breakfast, it'll be served looking like a mashed spam.
Pathetic, because everytime I see pictures of TWG alumni members in an activity like a workshop, forum, or just drinking beer, the more I refuse to succumb to the fact that the reason I cannot write is because I am not with them, although it seems that its obvious as the sun in midday. I cannot write because, it seems, as I am isolated from them, so am I isolated from literary practice. And to think that just after my graduation I have been hoping to improve my poetics, tch. So much so that when I imagine myself being with them in this or that event and the topic would be literature, I wouldn't be able to understand, much less keep up.
This year I don't remember writing anything with literary content, much less published on anything. Even managing to pass applications for workshops weren't done. I am not sure if this is to be blamed on my situation, or just my lack of organization and "talent," whatever that may be. I am thinking of being "invisible" from TWG people until I can write anything worthy of serious thought, but am not sure if this could be accomplished, or what would be accomplished by doing it.
As if being abused and degraded by my co-workers is not enough.
Fuck. I so hate this self doubt.
Was I really able to write?
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